gstevensblog

Slice of Life 2013

Slice of Life 2013 Day 10: Irreplaceable

on March 10, 2013

Slice of Life

Sundays are always hard for me now.

While I usually look forward to going to church, I have mixed feelings about the rest of the day. It usually takes a concentrated effort on my part to remain afloat and not get lost in the grief that is always threatening to overtake me, especially on Sunday.

I was sipping my coffee and enjoying the newspaper, some instrumental hymns playing softly in the background, when I read this.

That’s when I lost it.

The tears came just as I knew they would as I read the words that so perfectly describe the way I feel, “I realized in that moment that there are some things for which there are no substitutes. There are some things that we must mourn and cherish and say goodbye to.”

Irreplaceable.

In the article, it was the loss of lifelong friends. For me, it is my sister, Jane. She died from brain cancer two years ago, and I mourn her loss every day.

Especially on Sunday.

You see, on Sunday afternoons, Jane and I would always call each other on the phone and catch up. We lived far away from each other so our visits were rare. Our phone calls were our lifeline. We shared our lives, the good the bad and the ugly. We talked about our hopes, our fears, and our dreams. She was my biggest cheerleader. She thought I could do anything. She was my “go to” person, the person I would call first if I had any news to share. She loved me unconditionally. She was my big sister and I loved her so very deeply.

The phone doesn’t ring for me anymore on Sunday.

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6 responses to “Slice of Life 2013 Day 10: Irreplaceable

  1. I am so sorry for your loss, Gail. It is hard to lose a sister. I know this because two years ago, on February 21st, I lost my little sister to pancreatic cancer. Sundays are hard. I’m glad you wrote this slice. I found writing to be good for me.

    • gstevens1021 says:

      Thanks, Rhonda. I am sorry for your loss, too.

      Sisters are so special and most of us expect to live out our days with them. It seems so unfair when you lose one too soon.

  2. mrssurridge says:

    I’m sure that sister-shaped hole in your heart brings actual physical pain. I’m sad for your loss. I have those Sunday conversations with my mom and hope and pray we have thousands of Sundays left.

  3. Ellen says:

    Thank you for sharing this very poignant piece of writing.

  4. Brian Kelley says:

    Beautiful. I appreciate your sharing your love and honesty–it made my emotions swell and roll. But I keep coming back to the writer’s emotions and they remind me of a mountain. The closer I dare to get to them, the bigger they become.

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